Jokes

[EconAg05]

Post Rival jokes here.

I'll start:

What do 'Bama fans and maggots have in common?

They can both live off a dead bear for 30 years ;)

[polish]

The Texas football team can do almost everything with the ball except sign it.

What do they call a crime ring in Boulder?
A huddle

There are 4 Colorado Buffalo players in a car. Who is driving?
The police

[Lonnie75]

How many Tech football players does it take to screw in a light bulb?

1 but they get 3 credit hours for it.

[polish]

Q: What does a tornado and a Sooner cheerleader have in common?
A: They both eventually end up in a trailer park.

Q: What is the difference between an Okie cheerleader and a catfish?
A: One has whiskers and smells; the other is a fish.

Two Longhorn football players were down on 6th street partying up a storm.
They were hootin', hollerin' and yee hawin' when the bartender asked them why they were celebrating.
The smart one said proudly that they had just finished a jigsaw puzzle and it only took two months.
"Two months!?" exclaimed the bartender. "To complete a simple puzzle?"
The Longhorn replied, "Yeah, but the box said 4-6 years."


By the way are the jokes bad cause there are alot of views but no replies. . . tell me if you want more or stop posting crap

[TwelfthAG]

How many Tech football players does it take to screw in a light bulb?

1 but they get 3 credit hours for it.
lol Best one yet

[Vlyrock]

Keep 'em coming...I like reading them, but don't have any good ones.

[polish]

Q: Why was the Texas Tech football team late for their last game in Lincoln?
A: Every time their bus passed a sign that said 'Pizza Delivery', they did.

What happens when a Texas fan takes viagra?
He gets taller

Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, a classy Texas Tech Fan and an old drunk are
walking down the street together when they simultaneously spot a
hundred dollar bill. Who gets it?
* The old drunk, of course; the other three are mythical creatures.

[polish]

Q: What's the difference between Mack Brown and a puppy?
A: The puppy eventually stops whining.

A young ventriloquist is touring Oklahoma and stops to entertain at a bar in Norman.
He's doing his usual stupid Redneck jokes when an OU Linebacker in the audience stands up and says "I've heard just about enough of your smart ass redneck jokes; we ain't all stupid here in Oklahoma."
Flustered, the ventriloquist begins to apologize, when the OU linebacker pipes up: "You stay out of this mister, I'm talking to the smart ass little fella on your knee!"

Invited to a wedding reception by a relative, an Oklahoma State grad and his son travel to the big city for the first time.
After eating a lot of salty food, the father is thirsty and continually sends his son for water. After the last trip the kid comes back empty-handed. The father asks, "So where's my water, boy?"
"Couldn't get any this trip, Pa. Some guy's sitting on the well."

Q. Why doesn't the Kansas football team have its own webpage?
A. Because they can't put 3 W's together.

[StructuralPoke]

-- change teams to suit yourself --

---------

An O.U. family of football supporters head out one Saturday to do Their
Christmas shopping. While in the sports shop the son picks up an Cowboy
Jersey and says to his older sister, "I've decided to become a Cowboy
fan and I would like this for Christmas".

His big sister is outraged by this and promptly whacks him round the
head and says, "Go talk to your mother". Off goes the little lad with
the Cowboy Jersey in hand and finds his mother. "Mom?" "Yes son?" "I've
decided I'm going to be a Cowboy fan and I would like this jersey for
Christmas". The mother is outraged at this, promptly whacks him around
the head and says," Go talk to your father".

Off he goes with the Cowboy Jersey in hand and finds his father. "Dad?"
"Yes son?" "I've decided I'm going to be an Cowboy fan and I would like
this jersey for Christmas". The father is outraged and promptly whacks
his son around the head and says "No son of mine is ever going to be
seen in THAT!". About half an hour later they're all back in the car and
heading towards home. The father turns to his son and says

"Son, I hope you've learned something today?"

The son says, "Yes dad I have."

"Good son, what is it?"

The son replies,

"I've only been an Cowboy fan for an hour and I already hate you Sooner
bastards."

[polish]

Pretty good Structual, that joke works for any arrogant fan base

I gotta little story for ya' Ags

A Texas fan walks into a Austin bar with a dachshund under his arm. The dog is wearing a Longhorn jersey and helmet, and festooned with Texas pom-poms. The bartender says, "Hey! No pets are allowed in here! You'll have to leave!"
The Texas fan begs him: "Look, I'm desperate. We're both big fans, the TV is broken, and this is the only place around where we can watch the Texas-OU football game!"
After securing a promise that the dog will behave, the bartender relents and allows them to stay in the bar to watch the game. The big game begins with the Longhorns receiving the kickoff. They march down field, get stopped at the 30, and kick a field goal. With that the dog jumps up on the bar and begins walking up and down giving high-fives to everyone.
The bartender says, "Wow, that is the most amazing thing I've ever seen! What does that dog do if Texas scores a touchdown on OU?" The owner replies, "I don't know, I've only had him for a little over a year."