tu jokes

[aggie1997]

What do you call a drug ring in Austin???? A huddle

Four tu longhorns in a car, who's driving??? The police

The tu longhorns have adopted a new "Honor System".....
Yes your Honor,
No your Honor.

The tu longhorns knew they had to do something for their defense, so
they
hired a new defensive coordinator: Johnny Cochran!!! But they just
figured out that Johnny died last year.

How do the tu longhorns spend their first week at fall practice???
Studying their Miranda Rights.

What do you say to a longhorn in a suit??? Will the defendant please
rise.

If you see a longhorn football player on a bike, why don't you swerve
to hit him??? It might be your bike.

The longhorns employ scouts, but to look out for cops, not to scout
high school kids.

I heard a rumor that the Texas Department of Corrections plans to
build a new prison in Austin, Texas in order to allow longhorns to walk to
school.

What do you call it, when a longhorn goes on vacation??? Time off for
good behavior.

[pearland aggie93]

:laugh:

[GregH]

That stuff is FUNNY!:rep:

[Burnetaggie99]

:gig:

[Thisjeffguy07]

ehh... i've heard most of them before... just not the tu versions :bored:

[txags92]

An aggie petroleum engineer was working for a well control company over in Saudi Arabia fighting well fires. In the course of doing his job, he managed to come up with a technique that cut the time needed to control a well fire in half, saving the well owner hundreds of thousands of dollars in lost production and fire fighting costs.

Before he returned to the states, one of the richest sheiks in Saudi Arabia came to him and asked how he could possibly repay him for his innovative new methods that would save the kingdom millions of dollars.

He offered to buy the Aggie an opulant mansion. The Aggie turned him down claiming that his ranch house was all he really needed.

The sheik offered to buy him a fleet of rolls royce limousines, but the Aggie again turned him down, saying he had a pickup truck that he really enjoyed driving and it would be hard to haul much hay in the trunk of a limo.

The sheik offered to buy him a harem full of beautiful women to serve his every need, and the Aggied turned him down, saying he doubted his wife would appreciate the gesture.

So the sheik said "what on earth can I possibly buy you to thank you for what you have done for us...name anything you have ever wanted and I will make it yours."

The Aggie thought about it for a few moments before speaking and said "Well I am kind of embarrassed to even ask for this, because you will think I am silly...but I grew up really poor and didn't get much when I was a kid...so all my life, I always wanted a mickey mouse outift."

So the sheik bought him the University of Texas.